I can live for two months on a good compliment
Many of us find it very difficult to accept compliments. We either brush them off with self- deprecating words and reasons why they can’t possibly be true or we cancel them out by remembering the last critical comment we heard from the same person. At the very least, we feel uncomfortable. Sound familiar?
Why do we do that? Because many of us have poor self- esteem and our internal dialogue speaks a different language. It speaks the language of failure and of being unlovable. Of being too fat, too thin, too wrinkled, too stressed, too anxious, too reactive, too boring, just plain old ‘TOO’.
One of the wonderful things about a compliment is that we actually get to hear someone else’s experience of us. They have their own view and see us differently. If you can get through the initial discomfort and FEEL the compliment, it will quickly put a smile on your face and create warmth and energy between you.
Not only that, but receiving a compliment increases the dopamine in our brains. It makes us feel better about ourselves and inspires us to go back for more by repeating whatever we did or said. Or by just continuing to be our best selves.
Notice how delighted you feel when you give a compliment and it lights up your partner’s face. Conversely, notice how it feels when your compliments fall on deaf ears and are rejected.
We all crave positive attention and need to have positive energy shared with us. Perhaps if we can practise receiving compliments, we can inspire others to do so as well.
Don’t forget that we need 5 times as much positive to cancel out the negatives in our relationships so every compliment is as GOLD!
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